Day 1087

I have been held up in an abandon box car off the railroad tracks in the small town of Cowan, TN. The small city hall still had a weather worn American flag flying. I respectfully took it down folded it and placed inside the city hall; from the looks of it no one has been there for some time (no surprise). It always did upset me to see the flag out in the rain. The last few days have been your typical wet southern fall weather. So I’ve stayed put and tried to keep warm. I do not feel like walking in the rain. My head hurts most of the time, I have not been able to find any pharmacies, so I could at least get some aspirin. My ear on the side where I lost my hearing is bleeding. I may have an infection, what I would not give for some antibiotics. I have never been one to take much medication, because of the way the pharmaceutical companies abused deregulation. The advertising of drugs for every symptom in the world got out of hand. Another fine example of greed in this country.

In 1997 it was approved for the prescription drug industry to advertise direct to the consumer and the Genie was let out of the bottle. They could not pray on the worries of all that had the latest disease of the day the hypochondriacs of the world. Every disease had a catchy acronym so you could go to the Doctor and say I got “COPD” or “ADHD” or any thing that ends in “D”. I never knew “ED” was such a problem until it was broadcast ever commercial break. We had our war on drugs (illegal drugs) but the pharmaceutical companies were drugging America legally. Disease became like fashion, if you did not have it; you did after you watched a commercial about the symptoms. And the elderly were being over drug to the point they could not afford to eat or pay their heating bills for buying drugs. When someone has to choose medicine over food, something is wrong. Greed in the health care system was the shame of our country.

My wife and I tried to stay away from the Doctor; we tried to do everything natural we could to stay healthy as we got older. I hate going to the Doctor as you well know. And of coarse I had always been overweight (you would never know it, to see me now). But we managed to get by with out falling into the pill trap. Some I know were not so lucky, I remember this one guy around the turn (turn of the century) that had to work until the day he died because he was afraid to retire; he and his wife had so many prescription drugs to buy.

This old box car is parked next to a rail road museum. The old steam engine out front came from the turn of the last century. This country was still growing then; the turn of the next century was the start of its decline. I have walk three lonely years by myself, now it’s harder that every to walk alone. I miss her, I miss all my family.

There are some things I did not want to tell you, things I did not want to write about again. But I feel I am coming to the end, so I want to tell you a few of the stories about our family. I will try to cover it in the next several writings. But bear in mind I may not be able to write for the emotions this will stir; (I write this as if I’m truly writing to someone; who am I kidding). First let me start by saying this: your Son’s are the kind of men you can stand beside when trouble comes. They will make you prouder that you ever thought you could be; I wish I could see them one last time……… They await me just on the other side of this curtain in front of reality.