I am outside of Springfield IL right now it is late at night as I write this by fire light outside the tent while it is quite. I wanted to get down the events of the last few days before I forget. I was walking down I-55 headed towards Springfield going through a little community known as Williamsville (it caught my eye for obvious reasons). When I heard a rustling in the tall grass off the highway. I thought it was an animal (a rather large one from the sound of it), so I pulled out my rifle and stood still. It was coming towards me what ever it was and I thought that strange because most animals would have pick up my sent by now and ran. Suddenly out of the tall grass appeared this little girl, she look to be about five or six years old. She saw me but was not surprised by me at all, because she headed straight for me in a run. I was so shock I did not know what to do and before I knew it she was hugging my leg. She was crying and shuddering at the same time. Still in shock I put my rifle up and tried to kneel down towards her, but she would not let go of the death grip on my leg. Finley after some time of patting her on the back in a comforting way trying to stop her from crying, she let go a little and I knelt down beside her. I ask her, her name, but she said nothing. I pulled my sweat towel from my belt (a small towel I carry to wipe the sweat from my brow at times) and slowly gently tried to wipe the tears and dirt from her face.
She is
a small frail thing, she has blond hair and blues eyes and snubs when she cries. I made several attempts to get her to talk but she said nothing. I stood back up to see where she might could have come from and she started tugging on my leg. I tried to ask her what she wanted but she would run a few feet away and the come back and tug on my pant leg again, so I followed her. We went back through the tall grass and up a hill to a nice house (or what once was a nice house) that over looked the highway. She went straight inside an open door, I followed and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. That smell, no other smell compares to the smell of death. She took me to a bedroom in the back and there laid a woman, dead. On closer examination the woman was in the middle of childbirth when she passed and the baby (dead baby) had been expelled between her legs. Both looked to have been dead a least a week. In my horror I failed to notice that the little girl was pointing at the woman and looking at me as if she wanted me to do something. I grab her up in my arms and took her back out side, she cried and tried to get loose, like that wa
s not what she wanted me to do. We sat out side until she calm down, I told her that there was nothing I could do, they are both gone. I don’t know if she understood me or not, she looks like she would speak English, but I can not be sure maybe that is why she is not talking. But then it crossed my mind she would have been babbling something if she could talk at all. We sat for awhile; just sat there, she was right up under me as if my presence seem to calm her more.I pitched my tent out side of the house and made her a pallet inside out of some bed sheets I found in the house. I could not bear to sleep in that house and the little girl had been in it too long anyway. I guessed she saw me from the house as I was walking down the road and ran out to meet me. I woke up the next morning to find that during the night she had gotten right under me and slept with her arm around my leg all night. Bless her hart I’m a smelly old man, I don’t know how she stood it, but she stayed in that house for a week, so I guess I don’t smell as bad as that. After we ate (she seemed quite happy to be eating like it was something she had not done in a long time); I spent that day digging a grave. I had prayed once that I would never have to dig another one, but sometimes prayers go unanswered (or at least not answered in a way we can understand). I wrapped up the woman and baby and placed them in the grave. The little girl never left my side the whole time
. When I came up out of the shallow grave she stayed behind. I went back down and pulled her out, she started crying again, but she stood there as brave as I have ever seen any one as I covered up with dirt, who I guess was her Mom. Why God does a little girl so young and tender have to see such a sight, what kind of world is this now! Why did I have to happen along and see and do all this, have I not done enough, have I not lived to long.We walk the next few days on towards Springfield, she has stayed right by my side; she has not shed another tear. We did not walk that much, the going has been slow together; she has still not said one word. I hear her steady breathing in the tent as she sleeps, she likes for me to leave the flash light on, (I hope that old crank flash light does not wear out). The world is quite for her now, and her sleep is peacfull. I can only wonder about what happen, where the mother, baby and this little one came from. Where is the father, was there a father or was that poor woman a product of survival, was she prostituting her self out for food and a place to live? I have seen it before; men can still be animal’s, predators even now after all that has happened. This little girl was born after the dar
kness fell, no telling what she has seen. The mother looked as if she died from the jump if I guessed right; I hope she does not have it……..hope! I will call her Hope, for now until she tells me different, if she ever tells me anything. But I can do more than hope for her; I will pray she will be okay and pray I will know what to do with her, I will pray hard because I don’t know what else to do!Go to Day 1020
